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Some people think that one's mood depends on oneself. That happy people choose to be happy. And unhappy, melanchonic ones choose to lead life under a rainy cloud. That artists choose to be like that, so as to help them create art. All part of the creative process and all that.
Bullshit. This is all utter,total Bullshit.
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Do you really believe that I choose this? To cry myself to sleep everynight and have bloodshot and tearstained eyes behind sunglasses. Oh.
This life is useless and wasted, so I might aswell waste it away with my good friends Mr.Smirnoff and Mr.Daniels. Splendid. Life couldn't get any better.
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My mediocrity is killing me. My averageness. My illussions and denial of grandeur. Well I was wrong. I know that now. I am that much wiser now.
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I kneel down and try to pray. But the usual words refuse to come out and are rolling around my mouth and choking me. I forgot that God is dead for me. He/She may be alive and well for other people, but for me this deity isn't there.
posted by Zandeleigh @ 3:09 AM
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We are judged on our moods, sometimes, well ok most of the time. Everyone seems to just remember the odd bad things about ourselves, but forget the countless good ones. Which just plainly sucks. But why should we care ? They don't understand. They think we can control anything, even the incontrollable. And when no one understands, then there's that Smirnoff guy or as you said Mr. Daniels.
Nifhimha li dak li jiġi fuqek mhux neċessarjament ikun dak li tkun tixtieq int. Nemmen fil-kelma (jew aġġettiv) "beżżgħul". Imma nemmen ukoll fil-qawl "għin ruħek biex Alla jgħinek". Naħseb li l-make believe thinking hija għodda tajba meta tiġi biex iddewwi lilek innifsek mentalment.
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